HONESTY

This
is
honesty.
'Terico, so why you aint in school?'
I cant answer...
Not because I dont know but because I know they wont understand.
See Im smart.
1310 SAT. Honor student. Advid reader. Big vocabulary.
Too smart.
Scholarship to one of the most prestigious HBCUs in the land.
But I lost it.
Not that college work is hard....its VERY easy...
Its just that I didnt want to be there.
See, I was the smart kid in the hood, who OGs wouldnt let get in the streets.
Because they wanted to see me make it.
I was the hope of my family. The example for everyone else.
Not that Im saying that was too much of a burden.
Im saying the burden blocked my view of what I wanted and made me focus on what they wanted.
See Im smart. Was smart. Will be smart.
I was multi talented and excelled (drawing.writing.basketball.etc.)
I have a great personality, alot of confidence, and am self aware.
I was set.
College is the golden ticket. And I had it.
But I didnt want to be there.
I mean I miss the social aspects.
The friendships. The intellectual convos. Meeting ppl from different backgrounds. Trying new things.
But what I payed for...
The academics...I had no interest.
The sex. girls. 'guaranteed' money and etc. cant motivate me.
See I NEVER had a real aspiration to become 'average' or do a 'safe job'.
You know..a job where you get your degree and youre set.
NEVER.
I always dreamed big.
And it took for me to go to school to remove the burdens.
And see what I really want.
So if I fail. Its my fault for taking too long.
I know what I want.
And I dont want a backup plan...because no backup plan can hold my interest.
So Ima go full throttle doing what I do to get to my dream.
And I dont understand anyone who wont do the same.
But you dont understand that.
And
thats
honesty.